Apologies - A tough week

I'm sorry there's been no update for the past few days...as most of you are aware it's been a bit of a bad time.

Mum's health declined quite severely from the last post I made, which resulted in her being taken into hospital at 9:30pm on Thursday 12th July. Her temperature was 38.3 which was "dangerous" level, she had flu-like symptoms, and at this point she hadn't eaten or been able to keep water down for 4 days.
I took her in, at her request as she was starting to worry that there was something serious wrong, and thank God I did.

On Friday it was confirmed that Mum had neutropenia, dehydration and malnutrition, and having read up on this and spoken to the nurses at the Churchill hospital, had she left it any longer it would have been life-threatening, and could easily have been fatal. She was given IV fluids through her PICC line, aswell as anti-biotics, and anti-sickness medication too over a few days.

I am sorry this isn't more in-depth, but I'm knackered from all the typing and texting from the last few days (joys of having a big family and lots of friends!).

Mum was allowed home yesterday as her temperature had regulated itself, she was fully rehydrated, able to eat solid foods & generally feeling much better. This was a relief for her as the woman in the bed next to her was a complete wimp and kept Mum awake all night moaning and whimpering and generally being a drama queen.

Mum's looking and feeling much better today, although her legs are sore & feel heavy from where she spent nearly a week in bed...and her feet are a bit swollen. However she's just informed me that her hair is starting to fall out now, so I've called her breast care sister Karen so that she can arrange a wig voucher (although I'm not too sure what the panic for a wig is as Mum didn't wear the last one!).

Last time Mum's hair fell out, it was me who washed her hair, cut it and then shaved her head. This time it's Dan's turn. I think he's dreading it... although Mum's beautiful with, or without hair. I can totally get how he feels though, the thought of it was daunting - but, you do anything for those you love so if it makes her happy to shave it all off then that's what we'll do, together.

Thank you to everyone who's been in touch the last few days, sorry I've been a bit rubbish at texting back... I've been knackered & trying to get the house into some sort of order for when she came home. Hard-work paid off though...last night she slept in her nice clean bed, in her nice clean re-arranged bedroom & said she had a "lovely nights sleep".

One of the things Mum said to me before she had her chemotherapy was

"This is not a battle against staying alive, because that would be futile... It's a battle to prove cancer wrong and show that I am a strong person" 

...but in trying to prove that she was a strong person, she let herself get really poorly when she didn't need to.
Accepting the treatment, and indeed her fate, is what makes her a strong person.
Still going to work through this bloody illness, is what makes her a strong person.
Being so positive when the future looks bleak, is what makes her a strong person.
Her ability to be able to get up every day and still find time to laugh and joke is what makes her a strong person...

Asking for help doesn't make you weak - it makes you responsible & Mum needing the help of the hospital to make her feel better doesn't make her any less of a person, it gave her the chance to get some well deserved rest & treatment that I just couldn't give her... and the fact of the matter is, that had she not gone into hospital, Dan and I could have lost her. I'm just so glad we didn't. I'm also glad that she has said that if she feels this way again, she'll not hesitate to call triage and get herself taken in straight away.

There is a big chance of it happening again, but at least this time we know what neutropenia is, we know the warning signs and we know what to do.


H xx